This auto-portrait triptych was captured AFTER Francisco Rodón’s recent passing at age 88. I re-discovered him in 2008, a few years after I left my beloved Puerto Rico to pursue acting and photography in New York City. I write “re-discovered” because my mother owned a magazine that contained one of Rodón’s most famous portraits and I remember seeing this magazine floating around my home, and even flipping through it when I was young. I remember having my breath taken away by one specific portrait.  

Rodón is the only painter who had the privilege of painting world renowned Cuban dancer Alicia Alonso and “Llorando a Rodón en Butoh” is an homage to that specific portrait of Alicia. He depicts her with uncannily long fingernails. His use of lighting lives in an inceptive space between matchless and surreal. 

The second element that influenced “Llorando a Rodón en Butoh” was my own butoh dance practice. Japanese butoh dance is usually portrayed by dancers who are covered in either white paint or white clay. Butoh dancers are to dig into the deepest corners of their souls and to allow for the exteriorisation of its darkest parts. The combination of these elements yielded an auto-portrait that lives in a meditative space between mourning and fantasy. 

Rodón’s paintings inadvertently haunted me as a child and to this day I rejoice in contrition for both not paying attention to his work when I was young- who can blame me?- and for re-discovering him as an adult.